Tears of a Man

Most of the time they are invisible because as a man he conditions his tears to be invisible, even though pain is intolerable and unbearable. 

Mostly, a man's tears do not come unless he goes through very difficult circumstances of sadness and pain, or the feeling of injustice and oppression; and it is natural.

An important reason for a man's tears is lack of regard and ill-treatment by his wife. Please excuse me for my words and allow me to explain.

These tears are not due to weakness! But they  are due to pain. He cries when all his efforts for peaceful life have failed. He can't separate because he has sympathy for his wife. He can't severe the relations because he doesn't want his children to suffer in their lives. But his wife insults him morning and evening, or she humiliates him due to his job or looks, or patronizes him due to her work, degree, position; or shows superiority due to her wealth, or insults his family. Sometimes it may reach to the extent of insulting him in front of his family, or asking him to get out of the house, especially if the house is in her name, or telling him always that she was married to a good for nothing person, and inciting the children to rebel against him or narrating his shortcomings to the children. In such situations you can envisage the husband’s life and pain, especially if he is a respectful person in his society.

Such relentless badgering may lead to a man feeling cornered and emasculated. 

The resentment and frustration can build up over time, turning a wholesome, hearty man into a bitter, resentful shadow of his former self. 

A believing woman knows that he is her husband who shares her life, and he is the father of her children. Respecting him and being good with him has a great reward from Allah. 

She shows her respect for him even if his degree is less than her degree, and she honours him even if his money is less than her money.

She does not call her husband except with the best names, and she does not speak to him except in the best manner of speaking. She lightens his burdens, relieves his sadness and rejoices at his success.

I have had many cases in which women shed tears, but the most painful and difficult situation is seeing a man’s tears. 

Sheikh Abdus Salam al-Madani 

Founder,

Aspire College of Excellence in Chennai and Bangalore